Sunday, October 30, 2011

I'm scared

I'm scared because I don't have that one person who you go back to when happiness is flowing through you and you can't wait to share it
I'm scared
That one person
Who you go back to when the world disappoints you
When you're rained on by sadness
I have everything
I'm satisfied
I'm happy
I'm fine
But I'm scared
because I dont have you
You're not here.
I want you by my side
The world is burying me alive
The hole is closing
And I'm going breathless
I don't care
I just want to see you
One more time
I'm dying
Come back
Pour some life in me
Color me in
I want red
I want blue
I want green
I want yellow
Please look at me just one more time
I want pink
Why do I feel so grey?
Why is there a bright light at the end of the tunnel?
Bright light! Maybe thats where I am supposed to go
Are you waiting for me at the end of the tunnel?
I feel naked
So exposed
I'm bruised up
Red blotches on my body everywhere
Life is itching to get out of me
Why?
I dont have you
Am I dying?
Is that how it feels to die slowly?
extremely slow and painful
You are gone
Why is the sky not blue anymore?
I'm going blind
Wait, it's the hole
Sand in my eyes
It Hurts no more
I feel nothing
The grey has turned into black
I'm leaving
Moving forward into abyss
It's all gone
I dont have you
And I'm scared
You're laughing
Laughing at my misery
Your laugh is magical
Oh! the happy storm
I feel it inside me
Please don't leave yet
My heart is bleeding
Lungs filling up with blood
Breath stop breathing
I can no longer move
Stop
The world is spinning
Where am I?
I hear a baby crying
Tears running down my face
Why do I feel so small?
These creatures around me
They're holding me
Who are they?!
I'm scared
I want you
You're fading away
Your face is blurry
I dont remember how you look anymore
A distant memory
I'm dizzy
I feel a tear drop on my face
It's not mine
I look up
New world new people
They're looking down at me
With so much love that it almost hurts
I feel the love
It's everywhere
In their eyes, tears, and laughter
I see the sun smiling at me through the window
And a strange but beautiful face fading away in it
I smile back
It's lovely and colorful
I laugh and everyone laugh with me
I'm here again.
Somebody drops me and suddenly I remember the fading away face in the sun
Just for a second and it's gone.
I'm scared.